A doctor on his morning walk, noticed an elderly lady sitting on
her front step smoking a cigarette, so he walked up to her and
said, "I couldn't help but notice how happy you look!
What’s your secret?"
"I smoke a pack and a half day," she said, "and before I go
to bed, I do a little weed and down four shots of Jack Daniels.
For breakfast I scoff up half dozen Twinkies; lunch for me
is a Big Mac and by dinnertime I’m too wasted to even
think about eating. Oh yeah—and I dig oxycodone, love
getting laid and hate fuckin’ exercise."
"That is absolutely amazing! How old are you?" "Thirty-four," she replied
